1. What are you listening to right now?
None. Is that lame?? Hold on. Let me go put on something rockin’ sos I can answer this question properly…..
2. What song(s) make(s) you sad?
I made a big deal in my earlier music post about how music does not make me sad. Despite that, I’ll nominate Pearl Jam’s “Hey foxymophandlemama, thats me“ for song most likely to make me “sad”. There are lots of songs about sad subjects, but there with them, there seems to be an element of artistic license and fiction that remove the songs far enough from reality for me to avoid any emotional reactions. Hey foxymophandlemama is different because they the track apparently includes samples from an obscure documentary about actual psychiatric patients.
The track is disturbing from the start. Someone who sounds like a very young girl explaining her sado-masochistic preference for spankings over hugs:
INTERVIWER: Why is that better than being hugged?
PATIENT: Because you get closer to the person…
Closer to the person…
Just like a person having sex feels cared for…
We wanna be loved, so we have sex together…
And they feel loved about that…
And this is the way it makes me feel…loved…
I want it, I dream about it, I think about it, I want it…
Just like a girl wants sex with a boy, you know?
Its the way I’ll always be probably…
If this is real, you gotta wonder how this girl got to the point where she began talking like this. I could not have been good, but the mood lightens up by the middle of the track. The interviewers provide some comic relief by discussing her fastidious cleaning habits, which have earned her the nickname “Mop Handle Mama”. By then, I kinda warm up to this girl. She might be a little strange, but no longer dangerous–even oddly normal. She likes a spanking. Okay, whatever. To each her own, right?
The devastation occurs at the very end of the track. The interviewer asks the girl whether she thought she ever would kill herself. The girl beats around the bush for a little bit, building tremendous tension in the process. What is she going to say?? Would she do it?? Even now, every time I hear the track I root for her and hope she gives the right answer…..but she never does.
I very much want to find the source of this recording. First of all, I want to know if it is a real interview with a real patient. Secondly, I want to know whether the girl fulfilled her prophecy. I like to imagine that she did not.
3. What is the most annoying song in the world?
It’s funny: I actually enjoy a lot of fairly objectively annoying music, from Hanatarash to Yoko Ono. I ain’t gonna front. The reasonable person should find this sort of stuff to be annoying. However, when asked to reflect on what song annoys me, personally, subjectively, the first song that comes to mind is that “beneath my skin” song from Linkin’ Park. Ugh. Sorry, Linkin. I know you guys put a lot of work into that, but I’m not diggin’ it. A lot of people like it, tho…
4. Your all time favorite band?
I guess my tastes are firmly rooted in the old Pink Floyd. They’ve achieved a sort of emeritus position in my collection. They don’t get that much spin anymore. They clocked in at #14 on my top bands played at last.fm.
5. Your newly discovered band is?
6. Best female voice?
7. Best male voice?
It’s tough for me to pick best voices. I want to ask: “Best for what purpose?” The first that comes to mind when picking favorite voices is Tom Waits. It’s just really powerful. It’s like: BOOM. If you got ears, you gotta listen.
8. Music type you find yourself listening to most?
I usually just put my music on random, so it’s pretty much all over the place. When I go music shopping, I usually look specifically for stuff that I’ve never heard before–so if there were a type of music I listened to “most”, it would be by a tiny plurality, not a majority. …Unless I used a huge umbrella term, like “world music”.
9. What do you listen to, to hype you up?
See BOREDOMS, above.
11. Last gig/concert you went to?
Last February’s Scottish-Irish Midwinter Festival.
12. Band you find yourself listening to the most right now?
Boredoms. See above.
13. Most hated band?
Y’see. Hatred is a very strong reaction to a piece of music. I can’t really hate music. Except, perhaps, for hate music. But do I really “hate” the bands? I don’t know. I’m not much of a hater.
14. Song that makes you think?
The Nice: Happy Freuds
Here’s to all the people who know themselves
They look into a mirror and they know themselves
I will build them a mirror–they can see themselves as other people see them
15. Band that you think the world should love as much as you do?
!!! BOREDOMS !!! See above!!!
16. Coolest music video?
People do a lot of fun stuff with videos. It is tough for me to think. A good music video should have something to do with the song, I think. When I was a youngster, I always used to root for Guns n’ Roses November Rain to win all the video countdowns. I’ll stick with that for now.
17. Music video with the most babe watch?
Chris Isaak’s Wicked Game, of course.
18. What do you play/would you play in the bedroom to spice things up?
You know, I honestly don’t have an answer for this one? I imagine it would depend on the mood.
19. Can you play a musical instrument?
Not really. I pretend to. I “dabble”.
20. Ever been in a mosh pit?
21. Are you in a band?
23. Ever dated a musician?
Not, like, a professional musician, but I went out with a girl who could hold her own on guitar….
28. Do you wish that you were a musician?
29. Best chick band you know of?
Short-lived, but I dug the Cibo Matto.
31. Last song that you heard on the radio/CD…etc…?
“Etc.”, eh? Do I gotta whip out the canons of statutory interpretation?? I just listened to the Cibo Matto’s Sugar Water in preparation of the last question. Does that count?
32. What do you think of Classical music?
I generally don’t get into the full orchestra music. It’s kinda loud and impersonal. As with all other genres, there are exceptions. I like the small stuff, like the Debussy and Chopin piano stuff, as well as some Schubert string quartets, “etc.”, but I rarely ever specifically put on Western Classical musical for my listening pleasure. I much prefer Indian classical and Chinese classical music.
33. What do you think of Country music?
Old country is pretty OK, like the old Johnny Cash, “etc.” I can’t get into the new stuff.
34. What do you think of Death metal?
I think they’re trying too hard to “shred” and be all scary and theatrical while not hard enough to make interesting music.
35. Last BIG band that you saw live?
By “BIG”, I assume you mean widely popular. The trouble with that is we gotta get into line drawing. I imagine the “BIGGEST” band I ever saw was Aerosmith, way back in the day, but TOOL might fit the bill for purposes of this question. I really don’t get out to many concerts.
36. Are you a groupie?
37. Do you listen to music in foreign languages?
Sure. That’s, like, my modus operandi.
38. What famous musician would you like to “spend the night with”!?
I don’t know. I usually like to get to know people before I “spend the night with” them. Meg White is probably the type of answer you’re looking for.
39. Worst concert moment?
I went to a Ministry concert once. That was a long, painful moment.
40. Funny concert moment?
When Weird Al’s Bad Hair Tour came to the Wildwood Convention Center.
41. Sad concert moment?
I wasn’t present for either of these, but I can imagine the moment was sad when stage lights fell on Curtis Mayfield’s head during an outdoor performance and paralyzed him. Also, not that I’m a Pantera or Damageplan fan, but I can imagine the on-stage shooting of “Dimebag” Darrel Abbott would have been a sad thing to witness.
42. Best local act you can think of?
43. If you were a musical instrument what would you be?
How the hell am I supposed to know? I don’t really go for these if-you-were-a-_____-what-would-you-be type questions. I don’t know. Maybe I just have a hard time getting into the fantasy of choosing what I would like to be. If that makes me shallow or something, then so be it. I mean, if I were a musical instrument, would I get to choose what musical instrument I was? Is that, like, something that musical instruments get to do? Heck, I don’t know. I’ll just say I’d be a bazantar because that shows off my knowledge of obscure, badass musical instruments.
45. Do you watch music TV?
46. Do you follow the music charts, like the top 40?
No, I don’t.
47. Have you met any famous musicians?
Not that I recall.
49. Song that best describes your feelings right now?
I don’t know. There’s not much going on in the feelings department right now. Probably one of Tony Conrad’s drones.
50. Song that describes your life?
“Here we go” by Jon Brion describes pretty well my habit of laying low, and why I should quit it.
51. Do you know the names of all the band members that you listen to?
Actually, no. Sometimes I learn them, but I often forget.
52. Does a musician’s physical attractiveness play a role in the music that you listen to?
Not really. Good looks, or an interesting stage presence or gimmick can all help help (See: Dresden Dolls, White Stripes), but the music has to come first.
53. What famous musician do you want to marry?
I think the question assumes that I want to marry a famous musician. Is that a legitimate assumption?
53. Favorite movie sound track?
I really like the Jon Brion soundtracks, especially Punch Drunk Love and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. The Punch Drunk Love soundtrack stands alone better as a soundtrack. “Here we Go”, above, is from Punch Drunk Love.
55. Any musician pet hates?
Hah. Yeah, “hate” again may be too strong, but I “hate” when otherwise good guitar solos devolve into a repetition of the same one or two notes over and over again, and the guitar player is trying to milk all he can out of it: still scrunching his face all up and acting all tortured. It’s like: Dude. Give it up. The solo is clearly over. Let’s get back to the song, okay? (Not to pick on CSN&Y, because I really like them, but here is an example.)
Another pet “hate” is the over-use of “yeah” and “no” simply to fill space, especially when preceded by “ah”. I don’t mind humming. I don’t mind “la, la, la”, but if you’re saying “yeah”, you’d better be answering a question or something. (Not to pick on Alice and Chains, but here is an example.)
56. What do your parents listen to?
My dad listens to a variety of Irish music, but heavy on modern Irish rock/punk. My mom likes the Irish stuff, too, but her tastes are more like mine, spanning many decades and genres. She’ll go from 60s pop to big band to the occasional 70s prog with some ’80s sprinkled in. It’s a good mix.
57. What are you listening to right NOW?
Still nothing. How lame is that?
58. Do you wear band etc T-shirts?
No. I used to, but in an single act of defiance several years ago, I purged almost all of my t-shirts. Music t-shirts generally were not spared, except for my Velvet Underground & Nico shirt, which I saved for sentimental reasons and have apparently lost.
59. Do you cook to music?
60. Do you sing in the toilet?